Friday, June 12, 2009

What On Earth Is Wrong With Cleveland?

Anybody catch the highlights of the Royals-Indians game last night? The game ended controversially in the 10th when royals outfielder Coco Crisp was prevented from fielding a ball hit up the middle, thus allowing Cleveland to score the winning run. What stopped him, you wonder? Giant seagulls. A swarm of giant seagulls that had descended on the field during play. The video of the play is ridiculous.

And who can forget when Joba Chamberlain was brutally assaulted by a plague of insects in the 2007 playoffs . . . in Cleveland.

The only thing missing from this picture is Yul Brynner chasing Charlton Heston around in a chariot. This shit just doesn't seem to happen unless it happens in the Old Testament or in Cleveland. Now, any self-respecting person would probably be embarrassed that visitors to their city get attacked by insects or pests. But the Clevelandians, they seem to embrace it, going so far as to have adopted the "Rally Midge" as a sort of team mascot. During the recent Yankees-Indians series in Cleveland - the swarm was back again for this series, by the way - I'm sure I saw a shot of the Cleveland jumbotron showing a graphic called Rally Midges that appeared to have giant bugs crawling on it. Now that's gross.

Add to that the increasing number of Cleveland Browns players who have been struck down by staph infections over the past few years. I think staph infection and I think puss filled blisters, swollen joints, fever, etc.. In other words, something you might associate with a Biblical plague.

Cleveland, OH. Where sports and Biblical plagues meet.


swandad said...

We call it "home field advantage"...

Bloggity Blog Blog said...

I think everyone else calls it yucky. And not for nothing, but this home field advantage isn't exactly winning Cleveland any titles.